:: Prophet Muhammad's Communication Skills Part 1::

Assalam Alaikum!!!

This is the updated post, with easier reading fonts than previous post. Content is the same, just that I did a nicer job in arrangement in this updated post! =D haa~ I am such a perfectionist!

Anyway, Allah(SWT) is surely guiding me with things I am reading~ Just one day when I am browsing the internet, this article caught my eye! Alhamdulliah!!! He is giving my knowledge! This is something which I need in preparing for breaking the news to my family that I am a muslim!

Yay!!! =) Just gotta read and understand and try to implement into my "plan"! yoOoohoOoo! Insha'Allah, hope my family will understand me! =)

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

We Are All in the Same Boat

Prophet Muhammad's Communication Skills (Part 1)
Taken from http://www.readingislam.com/servlet/Satellite?c=Article_C&cid=1199279880239&pagename=Zone-English-Discover_Islam/DIELayout

By Sahar El-Nadi
Consultant and Writer

Communicating with others is a value that we need to use more often and Prophet Muhammad can be the example we need. 

The ability to communicate with one another is a precious gift God gave humans. It’s amazing to be able to turn our thoughts, feelings, and ideas into different codes we could transmit to others and receive feedback through our different senses; thus enabling us to learn, teach, and interact with others in our communities, as well as with the universe at large.

Through these same codes of communication, God would also communicate His presence and His messages to people -through special envoys- in order to guide them and lead them to safety until the end of their journey of life.

In every era of history, special individuals from among the people alive at that time were chosen to transmit His messages, those were the messengers of God, may peace be upon them all.

As Prophets, they need to be able to listen as effectively as they talk. Their role as communication mediators, concerned with delivering precise messages from The One God to their nations required exceptional communication skills: they had to be very eloquent in language and knowledgeable in local culture in order to deliver exceptional orations; physically attractive charismatic leaders to command respect and attention during their presentations.

They should be well-mannered to inspire listeners as live examples of their message; skilled at using emotional intelligence to choose their timing, content, and adjust their emotions according to each situation.

In addition to empathy, wisdom, and patience to be able to listen as effectively as they talk, and to see things from their audience’s perspective in order to offer appropriate solutions.

Mission Impossible

From among God’s messengers, Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, was chosen for a monumental task: to deliver God’s message to all mankind until the end of time.

So, not only was he commanded to inform his own people in his geographical environment during his lifetime, but his mission stretched to include communicating with every human, in every corner of the world, from the day he was chosen as a Prophet to the very last day on this earth.

When I think about this impossible communication situation, I immediately remember one of the first verses of the Quran revealed to him at the start of his mission:

{We shall send down to you a weighty Message} (Al-Muzzammil, 73:5)

And indeed it was a weighty message, not just in its great content, but also in the immense communication skills required to deliver it thoroughly to a never-ending line of diverse audience, spanning numerous eras and places, through barriers of time, culture, and whatever unimaginable changes human progress would bring.

The Prophet Muhammad's mission stretched to include communicating with every human, in every corner of the world. Today, Islam is the fastest growing religion on earth, with followers approaching two billion people. It’s astonishing to see Muhammad, peace be upon him succeed in this mission, despite the colossal hurdles.

We can’t help but wonder: what are the communication skills that this unique man possessed which qualified him for the honor -and agony-of this ‘mission impossible’?

I’d like to explore with you in this series of articles different aspects of his style of communication; perhaps we could improve our daily lives wherever we live in God’s vast world.

We Are Together On This

As a timeless example for mankind, Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, had six main spheres of communication working in parallel all the time: the first sphere was his connection with God; then with his family; his companions, the Muslim community; his enemies; and the rest of the world. He managed to handle all of them successfully with astounding skill.

In today’s fast paced material world, we sadly watch those spheres morphing together and rapidly shrinking to include only our immediate needs, worries, and ambitions.

In our race for more possessions and personal success, we feel we don’t have time for others, so we connect with them less, and focus on ourselves more.

The result is a world on the verge of destruction because of an increasing number of selfish humans, who communicate less, care less, and take more than their share of everything, even clean air to breathe.

To regain its balance, the world needs more people who are in touch with humanity and with the universe; whose focus includes the wellbeing of others, of the environment, and of the future, whose perception of our world as one unit makes them care for humanity as one nation.

Recognizing that if the ice sheet in Greenland melts, the Nile Delta in Egypt drowns, and if the ozone layer is damaged in the US, more people suffer skin cancer in Australia, because although we may live far apart, we’re actually all "in the same boat". Yet, to be able to turn the tide, such good people need to communicate their values to the world urgently and effectively.

The Art of Analogies

This exact situation was one of Prophet Muhammad’s challenges. Amidst the corruption of the world he was brought into, it wasn’t enough to preach directly, he needed exceptionally effective communication to change paradigms decisively and quickly in order to change the world in one lifetime. So, sometimes he used analogies to illustrate concepts. The Prophet -peace be upon him- said:

"The example of those abiding by God's rules in comparison to those who violate them is like people who drew lots for their seats in a ship. Some of them got seats in the upper deck, and the others in the lower. When the ones below needed water, they had to go up to bring it (which troubled the others), so they said, ‘Let us make a hole in our share of the ship to get water and save those above us from trouble’. If the people in the upper deck left the others do what they had suggested, all the people of the ship would be destroyed, but if they prevented them, both parties would be safe." (Bukhari)

This simple analogy gives us a vivid mental picture to remember and reflect on. It drives in a deep lesson with minimal effort yet with lasting effects. It even gives us a creative idea for communicating an important concept visually to children in order to raise awareness for the future of our environment.

One of my Muslim friends in a Western country complained that kids in her neighborhood are constantly misbehaving, to the extent of spray-painting obscenities on walls. She was wondering if it’s worth it to try to improve the situation, or is it enough to protect her own kids from mixing with their peers and focus on her own home rather than trying to improving the community.

Reflecting on the boat parable, I suggested she involves the parents and the local Imam in her area to get all the kids (both innocent and guilty) to clean and repaint the wall together, then invite everyone to attend a fun sketch derived from the hadith.

we need to explain how we’re all passengers on the same ship, and that if each of us thinks of their local community as this ship, with some people on the ‘top deck’ (i.e. with more knowledge and faith, and consequently better manners and social responsibility) and some people on the ‘lower deck’, then we would proactively join hands to gently educate the less fortunate, and try persistently to ‘save the boat’.

With yet simple- communication, Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, sent us a timeless, universal, multi-cultural message, for young and old, men and women, educated and illiterate, urging us to look outside ourselves, combat our indifference, stretch our attention outside our doorsteps, and get up and make a difference, recognizing that we must not let the wrong-doers take advantage of our beautiful world.

:: A different kind of love story ::

AssalamAlaikum,

Wew! Another story to share~

And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-Sabirun (the patient).

( سورة البقرة , Al-Baqara, Chapter #2, Verse #155)

W'salam,
Khadijah C.

A different kind of love story

(Taken from http://saudilife.net/component/content/article/44-jeddah/179-a-different-kind-of-love-story.html#comment-7)

Faraz Omar
Thursday, 18 February 2010 23:34



JEDDAH -- The love between an Islamic preacher with special needs and a Holy Qur'an teacher has turned into marriage.

The touching story began when Abdullah Banimah, who is completely paralyzed appeared on a satellite television program talking about spreading the message of Islam in several countries in the world.

When his future wife saw the program she immediately told her father about her desire to marry him because she admired him for courageously facing up to his disability and for dedicating his life to Islamic preaching.

Their dream turned true Tuesday when their friends queued along the road leading to the Al-Salam Wedding Hall in Jeddah to wish the couple a happy married life.

Abdullah had almost drowned in a swimming pool at a sports club in Jeddah. He had remained underwater for 15 minutes. This caused a great deal of damage to his brain which resulted in his paralysis.

The incident made him change his life completely by dedicating it to Islamic work.

Dhaiffallah bin Saad Al-Ghamadi, the bride's father, said: "My daughter, who works as teacher for one of the Holy Qur'an memorization schools in Jeddah, chose Abdullah on her own. After insisting she wanted to get married to him, I bowed to her will."


Dhaifallah said the reason for marrying Abdullah is for them to work hand-in-hand in the way of Allah.


Omar Banamh, the groom's father, said: "I have nothing to say but to pray to Allah to crown this marriage by blessing them with pious offspring."


He said he hoped Abdullah will see his children grow up with no disability.


Abdullah was ecstatic about his marriage.


"In the beginning I could not believe this was her desire. She really surprised me. I will never ever forget her noble stand and insistence on accepting me as her husband. I pray to Allah day and night to enable me to make her happy for the rest of my life."


He said he will never forget, for the rest of his days, the many people who had gathered to wish him a happy marriage."


Whew! What a story. Number of points there.


1. There do exist such people Masha Allah. The daughter, her father, her family should all be praised. Imagine yourself in that situation. Would you do that? Or would you allow your daughter to marry a crippled man? What about the extended family? She belongs to Al-Ghamdi family, which means she comes from the so-called "high society". How difficult would it be for people to disregard social honor and societal pressure?.


This is why these people are special, masha Allah. May Allah increase their guidance and bless them with good in this life and the hereafter. These are the role models of a society. They deserve coverage in the media. People need good examples.


2. Look at the zeal they have for Islam. Look at how this man's life changed after a tragedy. So the tragedy was the beginning really. A beginning of a journey insha Allah to achieve the eternal.


3. Despite all difficulties, if Allah wants to bless someone with something, it will come to you. Who would have thought a paralyzed man would get married in the first place? He not only got married, but got a wife who is Insha Allah better than many women.


4. Look at the noble way in which the woman approached the issue of marriage. She fell in love -- a genuine liking for the man and wanted to marry him. She spoke to her father and her father approached the man's family. This is so noble. It's the pure path Islam has facilitated for men and women -- marriage. At stark contrast is the lewd path, where men or women express their feelings to each other and fall into Haraam and illicit relationships. A slippery slope that pulls people down the pit of lust. There's no love, purity or chastity -- there's only pain, selfishness and desires that turn human beings into animals.

:: Homosexuals / Bisexuals / Transgender Pt 2 ::

Assalam Alaikum,


Just something more interesting to share!

W'salam,
Khadijah C.

:: Malay-Muslim & Chinese-Muslim Paradox ::

Assalam Alaikum~


Just as I was trying to find more blogs of chinese muslims online, I came upon this blog which mentioned what Dr. Mohd Asri Zainul Abidin voiced.


I was just thinking... Maybe this is one of the BIG issues, that I will have to talk to my parents about because often, the equation in majority's mind is Muslim=Malay... Well, I should do more research and maybe... Insha'Allah, I will be able to break that stereotyping~


Things are tough when culture is mixed with religion... =( Then again, within culture, there are distinction too... hmMmmm... And making matter worst, majority loves to OVERgeneralize when they are faced with challenges... 


Just an example... 


If there is a potato with growing buds (which means poisonous) in a bag of potatoes, 

• There are some who will just throw that potato away and continue to use the rest...
• There are some who will throw that potato and check for other potatoes, just  to be cautious...
• There are some who will overgeneralize that all potatoes in the bag are somehow rotten to certain degree, hence, throw the whole bag away...

Yes, it is true that overgeneralize can protect one's interest... But with that, the person has given up hope of finding the best among the bag of potatoes... No chance for other potatoes in that bag... Never know, it's just ONE potato which is bad... The rest can be made into soup and feed the poor! Isn't it good?


Well, at least they are potatoes without feelings... How hurtful the rest of the potatoes would feel if they are not treated fairly just because over generalization... OUCH! =(


Anyway, this is an example to illustrate my thoughts... hehehe~ Making me hungry now! Potato soup!!! =D


And and, the article is in the context of Malaysia... I think Singaporean Malays are different! Well, at least for the group of my friends I'm with... =D


May Allah (SWT) send me wisdom to counter this issue~ 




W'salam,
Khadijah C.




==============================================


Article taken from http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beritamalaysia/message/91895


It's the faith that matters, not race
By Mohd Asri Zainul Abidin
04 February, 2007

http://www.nst.com.my/Current_News/nst/Sunday/Columns/20070204120118/Article/pp_index_html

IN my observations, among the serious misunderstandings involving religion is the use of the term "Malay" as synonymous with Islam and "Chinese" with infidel. There are Malays who describe a new Muslim convert as masuk Melayu (becoming Malay) or sometimes say that he is "not Muslim but Chinese!" For them, the Chinese represent the infidels and Malays embody the Muslims.

To make matters worse, some Malays label the converted Chinese as mualaf and, more disparagingly in the northern Peninsula dialect, Mat Loh.

Malays assume they are the only pure Muslims, although Chinese Muslims may have stronger faith.

To some Malays, Chinese Muslims are not authentic and are seen merely as hitchhikers.

However, many Chinese who have converted to Islam are more pious, while many Muslim-born Malays are of questionable devotion. Malay attire such as kain pelikat, baju melayu and samping are not the garments worn by the Prophet.

But Malays perceive their clothing as Islamic because it is from Malay culture.

Islam does not impede a culture which is not against its teachings. In the past, Malays perceived the use of chopsticks as wrong because it was associated with Chinese culture.

Actually, there is no difference between eating with one's fingers or using cutlery, or chopsticks. The Prophet called on Muslims to invoke Allah's name, use their right hand and only eat permissible food.

The Prophet once told a young Umar Abi Salamah when the latter was about to eat: "Dear child, say Allah's name, eat with your right hand and consume what is close to you." (Hadith of al-Bukhari and Muslim).

Malays will normally ask Chinese Muslims to change to Arabic names, as if the name Ah Chong, Ah Seng, Lim or Koh would mean they were unIslamic.

Maybe because such names do not sound Arabic, the Malays feel awkward about them.

Sadly, the Malays do not feel the same way about names such as Awang, Leman, Seman and others which are not Arabic either. In reality, there are many Malay names which do not have any meaning in Arabic and some have bad meanings if they are translated.

Still, it is all right for the Malays because they are, after all, Malay names.

Again, are Malays Islam and Islam Malays? The Prophet did not ask those who embraced Islam to change their names as long as they did not have bad meanings.

For instance, the name Umar was used during the pre-Islamic Jahiliyyah period and remained when the person became a Muslim.

I do not stop any Chinese Muslim from changing his name, especially if the new name will make him feel closer to the Muslim community.

Still, they must be given the choice to do so. If the changed names only make non-Muslim Chinese afraid of embracing Islam and fearful that their families will disown them, is it wrong for them to maintain their Chinese names?

If Awang can keep his name, why not Ah Chong?

An assumption that Islam mirrors Malay characteristics has dire consequences in many areas, especially when some Malays themselves act against the teachings of Islam.

Fortunately, most Malays still adhere to the teachings of Islam.

A strong faith is the saving grace in the hereafter.

However, we cannot ignore the fact that many Malays practice syirik (polytheism) and ridicule Allah's commandments and the Sunnah (teachings of the Prophet).

These Malays are only Muslim in name.

From the perspective of history, the majority of the Chinese in Malaysia are non-Muslims. The call of Islam does not seem to reach them. Perhaps this is because the Malays have not effectively imparted the correct form of dakwah (missionary work).

Instead, many Malays portray an attitude that is against Islam.

Although the Malays can discuss many things with the Chinese, including the political party they should vote for, the Malays do not seem capable of presenting the greatness of Islam and inviting the Chinese to follow their religion.

Since many Malays contradict the teachings of Islam, the majority of the Chinese have misconceptions about Islam or abhor the idea of embracing Islam.

Islam is against negative traits such as laziness, apathy, envy and the like. Unfortunately, many Malays possess such attributes.

For instance, many Malay students are left behind in their studies. If they are set against the Chinese, either at school or university, many of the Malays will lag.

Also, most Malays are not interested in acquiring true Islamic knowledge. They would rather listen to Israiliyyat stories (derived from the Bible and Jewish folklore, used to help "fill in" the details especially when the passage is a narrative piece, which were traditionally deemed helpful or at least not harmful but could cloud the meanings of the Quran), fables and advice which are not founded in the Quran and Sunnah.

They prefer easy instruction without research and thought. At public libraries, the number of Malays using these facilities is still small. Chinese students diligently acquire knowledge, whereas many of their Malay
counterparts are distracted by other things.

Some Malay parents will seek out blessed raisins and water for their children just before sitting for examinations to bring on good results. In the end, only those who study hard will excel, not the ones relying on blessed raisins and water.

The non-Muslim Chinese will reject Islam when they witness the Malays' dependence on such practices but still fail to do well in their examinations.

Academically strong Muslims will not rely on water that was blessed with the Surah Yassin (one of the most important chapters in the Quran). Previous generations excelled because they stressed the importance of knowledge and were sincere in their efforts to acquire it. They were not merely focused on getting a certificate. Such qualities led to the creation of a powerful civilisation of knowledge in Islam.

Sometimes we as Muslims should praise the Chinese. Their children can still do well in their undertakings with neither high education nor paper qualifications. They either inherited the skills from their parents or from practical learning. Many successful Chinese businessmen are masters in their respective fields without having official paper qualifications. This trait is highly regarded by Islam. The religion urges its followers to rely on Allah and to increase their knowledge. In Surah Taha (verse 113) God says:
"(Say Muhammad) Oh Lord, increase my knowledge."

Based on what I have mentioned above, how can the Malays bring the non-Muslim Chinese closer to Islam and convince them that Islam has shaped the Malays to become noble human beings? The Chinese businessmen are better managers and portray strong positive traits compared with their Malay  counterparts - to the extent that many Malays have more confidence in Chinese businessmen than their own. Where are people like Abd al-Rahman bin Auf, a Muslim role model of doing business? Maybe the Chinese, the majority of whom are non-Muslims, have a keener insight into Abd al-Rahman's business
acumen than the Malays.

There is much else that I can say, to the point that I am inclined to think that if the Malays were not Muslim, there would be little else they can be proud of. If the Chinese can receive Islam in its true form, they will have much to offer.
--------------------------------------------------------
* The writer is the Mufti of Perlis.

:: Dr. Brown, another motivation of mine ::

Assalam Alaikum!!! =D

Just another link to share about this convert in US, who is a doctor and loses practically everything within a year of him being a Muslim... In the video, he mentioned how his loved ones, including his wife, children and parents left him... Making matter worst, his wife took his children and property, making him homeless... =(

But Alhamdulliah, because of his firm faith, he was given better things in life! Yay!! Praises to Allah(SWT) for making his promise true!! =D

Just my thought here...

When things are taken away, it's just maybe a way of Allah(SWT) to give us something better!!! He always wants the best for us, doesn't He? But we are the one who follow our desires and going against what He has for us... In the end, we got terribly hurt... But Allah(SWT) is soOoo forgiving that He forgives us when we repent and turn to him again... He will give us the best again!!! yoOoohoOoo!! =D 

Just gotta stay firm and patience as He has something else better for us!

That you believe in Allah and His Messenger (Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم) and that you strive hard and fight in the cause of Allah with your wealth and your lives: that will be better for you, if you but know!

[ سورة الصف , As-Saff 61:11]

Except those who repent (from hypocrisy), do righteous good deeds, hold fast to Allah, and purify their religion for Allah (by worshipping none but Allah, and do good for Allah's sake only, not to show off), then they will be with the believers. And Allah will grant the believers a great reward.

[ سورة النساء , An-Nisa, 4:146]

Whatever Dr. Brown said in the video are my deepest fear, but I'm not going anywhere else, except to stay on the lighted, guided path... I'm praying hard that family and friends would understand my decision~ Pray for me to be strong and be firm~
 
 
W'salam,
Khadijah C.

:: Half my deen ::

Assalam Alaikum!!! =D


hehehe~ I did something smartie!!! Oh well, I think it's smartie... =D


I am in the mode of waiting patiently for "half my deen"... My soulmate lah! hehehe~

One of my friends asked if why am I always thinking about marriage... Humph! I've been getting ready since long long time ago (Well, I thought I was!) but the fortunate man has not appeared yet! hahahaha~ Anyway, marriage is one of those things Allah(SWT) has created us for, right?

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.
[Ar-Room 30:21]

Oh well, now I realised I need to work harder to be a goodie wife and mother! Okay, don't laugh at me... I am just getting myself mentally prepared~ How many women out there are at loss when they are married?! And they just start to find solutions when problems are magnified! I think I'm just smartie to start gaining knowledge to know the simple basis of marriage before it happens!


Anyway, Allah (SWT) said he makes things in pair and I believe my other half will come! Maybe not in shinning armour with a white horse, but still, someone best-est for me as He, who created us, would want the best for me! I shall be waiting patiently... Insha'Allah~


There's soOoo much things to do while waiting!!!


Like, I need to learn how to pray proper, learning arabics, learning how to cook PROPER food, learning how to be tolerant, how to be considerate, etc... And also to prepare my family mentally for accepting me as a muslim and of course, my future family too! Wow!!! SoOoo many basic things I need to learn and do!


Well, also, I've started on something... hehehe~ Just beaming from ear to ear to think of this... I bought a notebook so that I can start writing to my hubby! Alright, stop laughing! It's not silly okay...=P This is smartie idea! And it would be the best gift he can ever received as a wedding gift!


Of course, I am not painting a perfect picture of my family... Every human being has their not-so-good and goodie sides... That's why Allah(SWT) makes us in pairs so that our soulmate and complete each other...


From what I see from my parents, there will be ups and downs, but what most important is how a couple should strived towards their goals in life~ It's never a "me, me, me" situation in married life because there'll be compromising and giving up stuffs that is only beneficial to oneself...


Wow, do I sound expert? hahahaha~


Just see the couples around us and reflect... and learn from those who have everlasting long marriages... Like our parents!


Alright, I'm not going to talk too much because it's just between me and hubby... And and HIM, our creator, Almighty!!! hee~ I pray that my half will come into my life soon! Meanwhile, I'll just write to him in my lovey dovey notebook... hehehehe~


W'salam,
Khadijah C. 

:: Critical thinking and reflection ::

AssalamAlaikum,

Just wanting to share this article about "What Drives People to convert to Islam"...

http://www.iqrasense.com/uncategorized/what-drives-people-to-convert-to-islam.html

Just speaks right to the point! Of course, this is for those who revert because they believe, not because they are married to a muslim man/woman, hence, the conversion...

The likeness of the life of the present is as the rain which We send down from the skies: by its mingling arises the produce of the earth- which provides food for men and animals: (It grows) till the earth is clad with its golden ornaments and is decked out (in beauty): the people to whom it belongs think they have all powers of disposal over it: There reaches it Our command by night or by day, and We make it like a harvest clean-mown, as if it had not flourished only the day before! thus do We explain the Signs in detail for those who reflect.

[Surah Yunus 10:24]

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

:: Peace by Forgiving ::

AssalamAlaikum,

It's me again! =) Just haven't been updating since I've been thinking much on forgiveness... Sometimes, it's just soOoo much ill feelings, like disappointment, anger, jealousy, etc... All these negative emotions are just works of Shaitan to mislead us in having a peaceful live... Personally, I have experienced all these emotions~

People who are betrayer after much has been done for them...

People who are "disappoint-or" after making promises and not fulfilling them...

People who just take advantage of your own goodness...

People who take you for granted...

And, to see others having what you has been wishing for make life more difficult...

And all these make you think if you are really silly to believe in people...

Then the emotional sins starts appearing...
(Just like those stated by the early Christians about the 7 deadly sins- Eg: Anger, Jealousy, despair)

This feeling gets soOooo much that it starts to make life negatively... Hopes are given up, there's fear in everything and life's just on the edge of the cliff... This applies to everyone, if only they think about it...

Then again, thinking of it, what's the use of all these negative feelings? It's getting nowhere but everyone feeling miserable and hurt... I mean, if things are done out of selfishness and people treat you badly, then who else to blame except oneself...

But the society is so bad that people are practically "lazy" as in not willing to take care of others welfare... or just making use of each other to get their own agenda - "Selfishness"... It's everywhere in the world... Even in schools!!! Where it should be the safest place to educate children... (Alright, I'm just helping my teacher friends to vent out anger! hahaha~)

But seriously, what is happening? Where is the sense of harmony? The sense of commitment? The care and concern for each other?

Allah (SWT) said in the Qur'an that he guides those whom he wills~ So, if we have all the qualities stated in the Qur'an that we take care of our community (Believers & disbelievers) and care for them... Yet in the end, we get heartbreaks and disappointment... Should we be the one who should be having negative feelings?

Or should they be disappointed because they are soOoo into their own selfishness that we should pity them because they are not the guided ones YET... unless they repent? Well, it would be good if they repent cause they would feel the guilt towards those they have done wrong... On the other hand, even if they don't repent, Allah (SWT) would punish them, wouldn't he? In either way, they are at the losing end... So, why contain negative feelings for "losers"... Negative feelings are just works of the Shaitan to mislead us...

Well, I agree... We are humans and we have such feelings and it's not easy to fight these feelings but thinking of it... We should work towards this "forgiveness" because it will make us better! And and... we should pity people who hurted us...

We should build our lives better so that they could see that whatever bad they had done to us, are not going to make us weak!!! On the contrary, we gotta be strong and stay firm!!! Show them that it's their lost by not having us in their lives.... Anyway, we have our greatest protector, who is the provider for everything we need! =D

Whatever ye are given (here) is (but) a convenience of this life: but that which is with Allah is better and more lasting: (it is) for those who believe and put their trust in their Lord:

Those who avoid the greater crimes and shameful deeds, and, when they are angry even then forgive;

Those who hearken to their Lord, and establish regular Prayer; who (conduct) their affairs by mutual Consultation; who spend out of what We bestow on them for Sustenance;

And those who, when an oppressive wrong is inflicted on them, (are not cowed but) help and defend themselves.

The recompense for an injury is an injury equal thereto (in degree): but if a person forgives and makes reconciliation, his reward is due from Allah. for ((Allah)) loveth not those who do wrong.

But indeed if any do help and defend themselves after a wrong (done) to them, against such there is no cause of blame.

The blame is only against those who oppress men and wrong-doing and insolently transgress beyond bounds through the land, defying right and justice: for such there will be a penalty grievous.

But indeed if any show patience and forgive, that would truly be an exercise of courageous will and resolution in the conduct of affairs.

For any whom Allah leaves astray, there is no protector thereafter. And thou wilt see the Wrong-doers, when in sight of the Penalty, Say: "Is there any way (to effect) a return?"

And thou wilt see them brought forward to the (Penalty), in a humble frame of mind because of (their) disgrace, (and) looking with a stealthy glance. And the Believers will say: "Those are indeed in loss, who have given to perdition their own selves and those belonging to them on the Day of Judgment. Behold! Truly the Wrong-doers are in a lasting Penalty!"

And no protectors have they to help them, other than Allah. And for any whom Allah leaves to stray, there is no way (to the Goal).

[Surah Ash-Shura 42:36-46]

And thus have We, by Our Command, sent inspiration to thee: thou knewest not (before) what was Revelation, and what was Faith; but We have made the (Qur'an) a Light, wherewith We guide such of Our servants as We will; and verily thou dost guide (men) to the Straight Way,-

The Way of Allah, to Whom belongs whatever is in the heavens and whatever is on earth. Behold (how) all affairs tend towards Allah.

[Surah Ash-Shura 42:52-53]

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

:: My first Webinar, Masha'Allah! ::

Assalam Alaikum!

hehehe~ Something interesting happened!

I was browsing through the videos in thedeenshow.com and I came upon the video on marriage. I looked through the video and I saw a website which makes me feel so much better of being single... hee~

he website is http://www.practimate.com and it's those "How-to-find-Mr-Right" kind of website. Just that it's all put in proper boundary in Islam~ I signed up for the webinar (Web Seminar) and below are some points I took down... hehehe~

Someone asked me why I'm always thinking of marriage~ hee~ Sound desperate ah... Anyway, this is for all the muslimah, not only for those looking looking, like me! Then again, I was reminded that though this topic of concern if important, still the most important comes from learning the prayers~ Shall learn eagerly now.. now now now, Insha'Allah~

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

Topic: Things A Single Muslim Man Secretly Looks For In A Wife

She is trustworthy in what she says

According to Megan Wyatt, the speaker in the webinar, Trustworthy is the first thing a muslimah should have. Being trustworthy shows that she can protect the honour of the husband. By being trustworthy means no shaming anyone behind anyone's back or even in front of their friends. No backbiting and don’t say bad, even when it is true. Speak only of the true good things as this share positive attitudes and practices among friends.

She needs him

Allah (SWT) has made the female special by making emotional and sensitive. This makes the man feels significant being the head of the household. The woman should just giving him a window to her world, to let him find his role in her world.

However, in modern times, as women are more educated than in the early generation, they are more independent since they are young. Because of the co-ed education system, Women are competing with men since young in terms of grades. Hence, this makes the women with the mentality that women is just as strong as men... Sometimes, this makes some women present themselves as a "know-it-all" kind of muslimah, over-independent on themselves that they find no need to have a companion.

Moreover, with the influences of the modern westernized culture, dating is so common that changing partners are like changing clothes. If doesn't like one, or one doesn't suit... Change it. Long goes the practice where a woman will stick to a man like superglue no matter what. And if a woman does this now, she's labelled as "Desperate"...

Having said that, Megan Wyatt recommended that woman should be be soft and emotional vulnerable, to have trust in her man and let down her guard. Then again, she mentioned that it is not for a woman to act stupid. Just make balance. The point is for the wife and husband to complete each other. Not compete with each other.

What she can offer as a wife

A muslimah should do reflection before committed to a marriage on what she can offer as a wife. Too often, they know what they want from the man but seldom they know what they can offer as a wife and mother of the man's children.

She is obedient

Obedience in the form of respecting him. Not just to do whatever he said but to know his boundary. To understand when husband put his feet down, he really really matters. Also, to allow the man to be the leader of the family and fulfill his role as a leader in his home. However, it needs to be communicated that all authority comes with responsibilities. Let him have a sense of significance in the household. Hence again, some guys are just irritating. They take advantage and start ruling over the wife, like a slave and sometimes, abusive. Therefore, there is no tranquility in the marriage.

Obedience in the form of respecting him. Not just to do whatever he said but to know his boundary. To understand when husband put his feet down, he really really matters. Also, to allow the man to be the leader of the family and fulfill his role as a leader in his home. However, it needs to be communicated that all authority comes with responsibilities. Let him have a sense of significance in the household. Hence again, some guys are just irritating. They take advantage and start ruling over the wife, like a slave and sometimes, abusive. Therefore, there is no tranquility in the marriage.

:: Difficulties are essential to train people and develop their characters ::

ADNAN OKTAR: How else could a person be tested and trained? How could anyone be trained and how could his character develop by way of comfort and enjoyment? What would he have to show fortitude over? Where would he show affection? Where would he protect and watch over others? How could he display generosity? Where could he use his reason and free will? What room would there be for courage? These things are all perfect virtues that make human beings human. Difficulties are essential in order for any of them to exist. Otherwise we would be like a smooth wall. We would lack a great many attributes. That is why Allah regards human beings as so valuable. Human beings are more valuable and important than angels, because they are tested and these tests contribute in the improvement of their features. Angels, for instance, can only display those specific features in the manner desired by Allah. It is man who encounters hardship and difficulties because, by Allah’s leave, he constantly uses his mind. For example, he uses his free will, fortitude, courage, loyalty, and he is loyal, isn’t he? He is loving and has to think deeply. Courage, in particular, is a very difficult thing, overcoming fear is a difficult thing. Struggle is a difficult thing. One uses one’s free will against sloth, for instance. Put these all together and a perfect human being emerges, and it is these aspects of people we love. Otherwise a person will literally die. I mean, does a corpse signify anything for us? No. Human beings would be like dead bodies. The reason we love people is because they have courage, and fortitude, and steadfastness, isn’t that so? And affection and generosity. A generous person is well loved, for instance. A forgiving person is well loved. To forgive, there must be something difficult. What could we exhibit fortitude in the face of if there were no hardships? Isn’t that right? We love someone because of his fortitude. One needs to have fortitude to maintain one’s bonds with what one loves. One needs courage to protect it, doesn’t one? People are able to put up with suffering, and they exhibit fortitude in the face of it. They are patient in the face of time. Let us suppose that one loves someone, one will wait 1 year for them, or 2 years or 3 years, won’t one? Anything else would be disloyalty. Some people can’t wait 1 or 2 days, let alone years. But Allah loves patient people. And we love patient people. We love generous people. And we want Allah to be generous toward us. We say, “O Lord, give us things and opportunities.” Right, so if you want Allah to be generous, you have to be generous, too. People want Allah to forgive, so we have to forgive. We want Allah to be loyal, so we have to be loyal. Allah is loyal. Allah fears nothing, for example. And people should fear nothing, either, they must be brave for Allah, by submitting to Allah. If the prophets had been fearful, for example, they could have given no service at all. Because the people around them were always threatening them and trying to kill them, setting traps and slandering and defaming them. When Hazrat Mahdi (as) appears, for instance, they will imprison him and oppress him, and he will be defamed and insulted. How can he do his work if he has no courage, no fortitude and no determination? All people will be happy as a result of his work, and everyone will know peace and joy. Look, the courage, loyalty and patience of just one man mean salvation for all mankind, isn’t that right? Just one man. If he were not loyal, patient and brave, mankind would sink, may Allah forbid. Allah uses him as His instrument. The same with the Messiah (as). He was very patient. Only 12 people believed in the Messiah at that time. He never lost his determination. Only 12 virtuous people, despite the tens of miracles he worked. But when he comes back, Allah will make the whole world believe in him. This will be clear proof that all power lies with Allah, insha’Allah. PRESENTER: Insha’Allah. Dec 29, 2009 Click here to access the article online

:: The disappearance of feelings of love, joy, peace and trust ::

THE DISAPPEARANCE OF FEELINGS OF LOVE, JOY, PEACE AND TRUST IN THE END TIMES(From Mr. Adnan Oktar’s live interview on Gaziantep Olay TV and Mavi Karadeniz TV, September 8^th, 2009)

ADNAN OKTAR:

We see no expression of love on almost anyone’s face. It is very, very rare; there is neither love nor trust, nor joy and happiness. What we have is a huge selfishness, a huge concern for self and instinct for survival, and the idea of let me survive, but others are not that important has begun to develop. In such a climate, of course no such thing as art, science or culture can develop in society. Notice how no great works of art are coming out, no great films are being made. No fine pictures are being painted, for instance, no new architectural works are appearing, no new plays are being written.

PRESENTER:

And even if they are, they are not given the value they deserve,

ADNAN OKTAR:

No, they are not. But compare that to the past. Fine works of art used to be produced, but no more. People’s brains and inspiration have become frozen. Because lovelessness, having no love of Allah, having no fear of Allah and a lack of spirituality kill the cells in the human body, kill the brain, and paralyze the brain. People’s most essential food is love, love of Allah. When they have that, their skin improves, their looks improve, their language improves, their creativity improves, an excitement develops; a painter produces the most marvelous paintings, for example. An architect designs marvelous buildings, and a builder can create stupendous buildings under that excitement. A businessman will do business really productively. But now, there is an infertility and infelicity all over the world. The world is waiting for the breath of Hazrat Mahdi (as), that beautiful breath of the Messiah. Allah has produced this state of blockage, and things are going on everywhere.

Dec 28, 2009
Taken from:http://tr1.harunyahya.com/Detail/T/EDCRFV/productId/19902/THE_DISAPPEARANCE_OF_FEELINGS_OF_LOVE,_JOY,_PEACE_AND_TRUST_IN_THE_END_TIME

Assalam Alaikum~

This article caught my attention and it just make me wonder about how did Sahabah live with our Prophet Muhammad (SAW)... I think I would fit in there well... To do things, just simply out of love for others and others do the same for you, without any ill intentions... Just uncomplicated life~

I guess I have this ability in me that I want to make people's life better... Maybe that's why I should be a teacher forever~ I thought being in Education would be a place where there are no game playing... Still, people take advantage and have personal agendas when "helping"~

I know, just simply said... I was naive... hahaha~ But isn't living with simple thinking in the simple world beautiful? No game playing... No hard feelings... But somehow, I got corrupted and start changing myself to live in this messy world~ I thought that maybe I should be less nice to people and be more selfish... I always wonder why there were some spoilt girls with guys going crazy over them, though the guys were treated badly and these girls just mess up the guys, which are left miserably heartbroken, disappointed in love... Whereas girls like me, often too patience and kind, ended up heartbroken and mending others heartbreaks...

But miracles happened...

Allah (SWT) found me back and knocked sense into me.... Time away from everything makes me reflect and eventually, I don't think I can do it... It's just not me to be too selfish because my joy comes from the joy of others~ To see people happy, I'm happy with them too! It's a simple equation... You are happy = I am happy~ If it's all within my reach, I would do all to help~

If people were to take advantage of me, should I be crying or that person should? For I have the love I have and he/she is soOoo poor in love that he/she has to take it from me... hmMmm...

Narrated Abdullah bin Amr bin Al-As: This Verse: 'Verily We have sent you (O Muhammad) as a witness, as a bringer of glad tidings and as a warner.' [48.8] Which is in the Qur'an, appears in the Surah thus: 'Verily We have sent you (O Muhammad) as a witness, as a bringer of glad tidings and as a warner, and as a protector for the illiterates (i.e., the Arabs.) You are my slave and My Apostle, and I have named you Al-Mutawakkil (one who depends upon Allah). You are neither hard-hearted nor of fierce character, nor one who shouts in the markets. You do not return evil for evil, but excuse and forgive. Allah will not take you unto Him till He guides through you a crocked (curved) nation on the right path by causing them to say: "None has the right to be worshipped but Allah." With such a statement He will cause to open blind eyes, deaf ears and hardened hearts.'

[Book #60, Hadith #362]

I think I just need to observe more and I'll try to adapt in this dog-eat-dog world... I am scare but deep down, I know Allah (SWT) is there to protect me! Yay! =)

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

:: Durood to praise our Prophet Muhammad (SAWS) ::

Assalam Alaikum~

A revert, without someone to share knowledge with, moves at a very slow pace~

Masha'Allah! I've got someone to tell me stories which just simply gives me more "WOW" factor in Islam...

I've learnt something new! =D yoOoohoOoo!!!

Durood

Simply, phrases to praise our Prophet Muhammad (SAWS)!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsoAOOFyQc8

http://www.youtube.com/muhammadidotme#p/u/5/kIgz7ABi9HY

I wish there are translation for me to know the meaning but the recitation is just enough to make me feel fonder of our Prophet!

I'm reading about his biography and it's amazing how he managed to go through all the trials Allah(SWT) has set for him~

Being a new convert is not easy but I am trying~ Lots of ideas and way of doing things got to change... But knowing Islam gives me countless good examples to follow!! Yay! =D Whenever things are tough, Prophet Muhammad (SAWS) gave me a reason to fight... I'm trying to learn from his attitude towards life.. Slowly, I will be able to gain more and more understanding of how he is and learn from him... Insha'Allah! May Allah give me wisdom and guidance to gain more and more the right way of living~

May Allah also continue to guide the person who shares with me the knowledge of Islam, so that I will have a lot lot lot more stories to hear!!! =)

W'salam,

Khadijah C.