:: Stories not to tell your kids ::

:: Start now for our children ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Syed Ammar Nakshawani talks about how we should bring up our children, starting with having the niyah even before the mother is pregnant with a child~ And how a child learns, even when he/she is in the womb~ 

Further on, he said that when mothers recite Surah Yusuf, the baby will come out looking like Yusuf! So I assume that if the baby is a girl, then gotta recite Surah Maryam...

Wow! This is new! hee~ =D

So, I shall be a bit 'kiasu' (Typical Singaporean!) and start having the niyah now! hee~

W'salam,
Khadijah C.

:: A young boy leading Taraweeh ::

:: 2 boys trying to pray ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Masha'Allah!!! =D Cute boys!!

The "imam" is so serious and intent on praying right. He nudges his friend to correct him, first time so he can say ameen after surat al-Fatiha and second so he can get up from sujood.

W'salam,

Khadjiah C.

:: How to Get Your Child to Graduate By Age 14 ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Worthy to read for everyone! Just something to start thinking about how to manage the children! Insha'Allah, one day I shall carry this out myself! =D

W'salam,

Khadjiah C.

How to Get Your Child to Graduate By Age 14

By Zohra Sarwari

Source: http://muslimmatters.org/2010/07/01/how-to-get-your-child-graduate-by-age-14/?sms_ss=blogger

My kids are on track to graduate from high school at age 14, inshaAllah. And at ages eight and six, my kids have collectively authored and published five books of their own, and are asked to speak at schools around the country – TabarakAllah.

I travel around the country giving seminars and talks to college students, parents, youth, Muslim and non-Muslim. One question I get all the time is, “How are you doing it Zohra?” How are your children so advanced for their ages?”

Alhamdulillah, first and foremost it’s with the tawfiq of Allah. However, it’s not as impossible as you may think:

You’re probably wondering, “What? How?” I will tell you a few strategies that can help you do the same. I will start off with, how they can graduate high school early.

Plan 1: Skipping Grades

Students taking placement tests and passing to the next class is not as hard as many parents think. The problem is that we don’t give our kids the benefit of doubt. All of our kids are geniuses; all we need to do is help them see it.

Kids are naturally motivated to excel on their own without mommy and daddy always looking behind their shoulders. This can work great when it comes to excelling in school.

For all the busy people who have to work, for the first two-to-three years of their child’s education, sit with them every evening and go over homework and also have the child explain it to the parents.

I know you’re probably thinking I don’t have any time for that – with dinner to serve, baths and so on. I am telling you that if you want your child to excel and not worry about nagging them later, then you need to sacrifice some time and be there for them when it counts. What I would do to take care of this problem is:

a.) Cook the whole week’s meals on Sunday’s and just heat and serve during the week.

b.) Take the phone off of the hook and just focus on your child for 1-2 hours. If you have more than one child, have all of them studying at the same time and spend a few minutes with each one. Basically make rounds during that time, so they each get your full attention.

Again, this will take some training and some pushing on your part, but remember the benefits are for you. If you can get all of your children to get scholarships to college would that alone not be worth it? If you have two or three children, that is the equivalent of saving anywhere between $30,000- $50,000. What’s sad is that most parents don’t even have that money to help their kids out with college, so everyone gets into debt for school.

Let’s just say that you really can’t do it because of how your life is scheduled right now, what about hiring a tutor for just a few dollars an hour; a young teenager to help your child with what you want. Believe me it will give your child confidence and skills that they didn’t know they had.

Plan 2: Home-schooling your children

Did you know that homeschooled children are the first to be recruited by universities such as Yale, Stanford and Harvard? They believe (and rightfully so) that homeschooled children are disciplined to learn and teach themselves. You’re probably thinking, “I am too busy, I can’t home school.” That’s what I was saying; I used to be a corporate mom and enjoyed it too.

After I realized that no one cared as much about my kid’s education as me, I changed my lifestyle to make it happen. However, I can hear some of you saying right now, “But I can’t do it, because of my responsibilities.” I understand, and will not push you do it my way, but for all of those moms who are at home, they can home school.

Imagine spending about three hours a day with your child to learn and the rest of the time, they teach themselves. They have to read books, do projects, explore. Imagine if you had a curriculum that helped them graduate high school by the age of 14. Which college would not want them? If they are that smart, you will have schools fighting for them. At that age, I personally recommend a university close to home, so parents can drop in and pick them up.

Imagine raising two, three or even four great kids who are smart, talented, well-educated and loved. What can those kids do for us? Anything. The problem with society today is we want to do everything and be great at it. However, the tragedy is usually the first thing to suffer is our families — be it our marriage or our kids.

We need to refocus and think about our lives, if we were to be alive 15 years from now, what is most important to us? Is it our careers, being a CEO of a company? Is it being the best lawyer? Or is it raising super stars and working part time with it? I am not saying ladies don’t have careers, all I am saying is that we need to focus on our families, too.

Maybe the first 15 years should be focused on teaching our kids manners, love, respect, hadith of the Prophet (PBUH) but most importantly, the Quran. Every morning wake them up to pray and read Quran before they leave the house.

We need to build families and not just careers. Allah (SWT) has put us on earth to test us. One of the tests is motherhood. Are we really doing what we should be doing, or are we just trying to keep up with the Joneses? If we don’t take care of our kids, with love, knowledge and patience, why will they want to take care of us as we age? Think about it. Think deeply. I will let you read this story to help better understand my point:

“A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law and four-year old grandson. The old man’s hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table.

But the elderly grandfather’s shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth. The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. “We must do something about father,” said the son. “I’ve had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.”

So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.

When the family glanced in grandfather’s direction, sometime he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence. One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, “What are you making?” Just as sweetly, the boy responded, “Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food in when I grow up.” The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.

The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what had to be done.

That evening the husband took grandfather’s hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.” – Unknown Author

I am a woman who likes to lead by my actions and not just my words, as for my children, all 3 of them want to be authors in areas that they can help society inshAllah. 

All 3 of them have goals to memorize the Quran and be scholars of Islam, and pursue other careers as well. My daughter wants to be a zoologist and get a Ph.D in Islam. My son wants to be a haffith, scholar, and an inventor. 

Remember that we must all answer to Allah (SWT) about how we took care of what He gave us. That should be enough for all of us to want to do it, for what will our answers be to Ar-Rahman? 

I leave you with words of encouragement to help your kids achieve their dreams and goals within the Islamic scope of life, they don’t have to give up their deen to be successful in this life, and they can do both inshAllah. However, they need the support of mom and dad.

In conclusion, your child can become anything, but needs your support along the way. Your child needs your love, compassion and patience to teach him or her. Be the best parent you can be, so that you don’t have regrets later! I hope that you have gotten the point that your child can graduate early inshAllah, and even have the chance of going to college early, but more than anything they have the potential to being the leaders for Ummah when you and I are gone, inshAllah. You must nurture the seeds you have planted, you water it, fertilize it, and give it sunshine or else it won’t bloom like you want it to.

For anyone who wants more information on home schooling, or how to make this process happen for them, please email me at zohra@zohrasarwari.com

Zohra Sarwari is a Muslim woman speaker who has authored and published nine books. She gets invited to speak all over the country in front of Muslims, non-Muslims, college students and parents alike. She and her daughter have been featured in places like Fox News and she was Noor TV’s 2009 Woman of the Year. To have her weekend seminar: “Live Forever: It’s your life’s dream” come to your city, please email zohra@zohrasarwari.com.

:: Child author - Alya Nuri ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Masha'Allah!!!
I want to bring up a daughter like Alya Nuri, who is a child author!
She started authoring books at the tender age of 7!
Wow wow... Amazing!!!

W'salam,
Khadijah C.

:: Muslim boy praying ::

Assalam Alaikum,

I'm not sure if this is ethical to share the video but I just couldn't control the joy of seeing such scene of children praying at young age! Masha'Allah~

W'salam,
Khadijah C.

:: Fajr prayer ::

:: 10 Things to hand down to your daughter ::

Taken from 10 Things to hand down to your daughter

1. Knowledge of and love for Allah and the Deen
This is one of the most precious and enduring gifts you can pass down to your daughter, one that will benefit her in this life and the next.

2. Memorisation of the Qur’an
No matter how little you have memorised yourself, push your daughter to memorise as much she can. Encourage her and help her to revise. It will stand her in good stead in her life and will be a source of reward for you after your death as well.

3. A good example of Muslim womanhood 
Most girls look to their mothers for guidance. Embody the characteristics of a strong, faithful Muslimah and she will be inspired to follow your example.

4. A sense of self-worth and self-esteem 
Instill a sense of confidence in your child by encouraging her skills, talents and personality to develop. Make her feel secure in her identity and show her that she is loved and appreciated. This will have a positive impact on her future relationships and how she interacts with the world.

5. A sense of modesty 
Instill a love for hijab in your daughter and encourage her to be modest, never boastful or conceited, in all areas of her life.

6. Your language 
If you speak Arabic, be sure to teach it to her so that she has the key to the understanding of the Qur’an. Also, if you have a mother tongue or speak a second language yourself, pass it on: a second or third language is always an asset, whether in a study, work or social environment.

7. A skill that you have 
If you are an avid gardener, knitter or love painting, pass your skill onto your daughter. With so many ‘traditional’ skills being lost in today’s fast-paced world, you owe it to her to share your knowledge and pass it on to the next generation.

8. Your favourite recipes 
Yes, teach your daughter how to cook! Be it from a cookbook, an original recipe or passed down from your mother or even your grandmother, we all have our own trademark recipes: pass them on to your daughter and encourage her to develop some specialities of her own.

9. Housekeeping skills 
Instill good housekeeping habits in all your children and encourage them to take pride in a neat and tidy home. Pass any tricks or shortcuts on so that your daughter is well-equipped when she has a home of her own.

10. Your family history 
Give her a sense of her roots and heritage by sharing your family story with her. Acquaint her with her family tree and teach her the lessons learned by the different generations. Hopefully, she will do the same with her children, insha Allah.

:: Being considerate ::

Assalam Alaikum,

I read this story and thought it would be great to share around~ 

Masha'Allah~ Sis Zabrina is such an amazing storyteller! 

This story illustrates the difference between inhabitants in hell and heaven... Being considerate is one of the qualities that differentiate them apart~


~ Life Storyteller : Motivational and Inspirational Stories for You and Me ~:
The Story of Long and Short Spoons


Enjoy the story!


W'salam,
Khadijah C.

:: Hurray For Baba Ali - Eating etiquettes ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Baba Ali is soOooo funny! hahaha~ But this is more for kiddos, teaching them the etiquettes for eating~ CuUutteEee...

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

:: Wonder kids-Ghufran Pathan ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Kids are just wonder if they are properly educated!

It's never too young to do anything! With proper training, children can achieve their potential!

Amazing boy!!! As you can guess, his favourite speaker is Dr. Zakir Naik! soOoo much like him!!! =D

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

:: Who we are ::

Assalam Alaikum,

I just saw this program in Peace TV and it's lovely for children! =D And new reverts who are kiddish like me! And and Zain Bhikha is leading the children to sing!!! CooOoooll... hehehehe~

This episode talks about the different people around the world and how they embraces Islam as their deen... Very interesting!!! =)

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

:: Boy's emotional narration ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Just saw this online and I was wow... Masha'Allah, what an amazing boy, narrating the events!!! Not sure if the events were true but surely, the boy has done a lot of preparation! Hope he will use his talent well when he grows up, Insha'Allah~

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

:: The Rights of Children in Islam ::

The Rights of Children in Islam
By Sheikh Al-Uthaymeen
Taken from http://www.missionislam.com/family/childrensrights.htm

Let us first establish that children in accordance with the Islamic concept means both male and female. Some Islamic opponents accuse Islam of differentiating between male and female children claiming that Islam prefers boys over girls in terms of inheritance, 'Aqeeqa (slaughter of two lambs upon the birth of a male baby, and one lamb only for a baby girl) and other matters.

In accordance with the true Islamic teaching, both male and female are alike in the sight of Allah, the Almighty. Each, however, is physically prepared and equipped to perform certain tasks and duties that are suitable to his/her nature. All, again are equal in religious duties, except for certain exceptions that are defined and illustrated by Allah, the Almighty, in the Glorious Quran, or declared and specified by Allah’s Apostle, PBUH. Only these differences are to be acknowledged and honored and only in accordance with Islam and its teachings.

Children, according to Islam, are entitled to various rights. The first and foremost of these rights is the right to be properly brought up, raised and educated. This means that children should be given suitable, sufficient, sound and adequate religious, ethical and moral guidance to last them for their entire lives. They should be engraved with true values, the meaning of right and wrong, true and false, correct and incorrect, appropriate and inappropriate and so forth and so on. Allah, the Almighty stated in the Glorious Qur’an:

Allah’s Apostle, PBUH also said: "Every one of you (people) is a shepherd. And every one is responsible for whatever falls under his responsibility. A man is like a shepherd of his own family, and he is responsible for them." This Hadith is reported by both Bukhari and Muslim.

O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and Stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allah, but do that which they are commanded.

( سورة التحريم , At-Tahrim, Chapter #66, Verse #6)

Children, therefore are a trust given to the parents. Parents will be responsible for this trust on the Day of Judgement. Parents are essentially responsible for the moral, ethical and the basic and essential religious teachings of their children.

If parents fulfill this responsibility, they will be free of the consequences on the Day of Judgement. The children will become better citizens and a pleasure to the eyes of their parents, first in this life, and in the hereafter.

Allah, the Almighty stated in the Glorious Quran:

"And those who believe and whose families follow them in Faith, to them shall We join their families: Nor shall We deprive them (of the fruit) of aught of their works: (Yet) is each individual in pledge for his deeds."
( سورة الطور , At-tur, Chapter #52, Verse #21)

Moreover, Allah's Apostle, PBUH said: "Upon death, man's deeds will (definitely) stop except for three deeds, namely: a continuous charitable fund, endowment or goodwill; knowledge left for people to benefit from; and pious righteous and God-fearing child who continuously prays Allah, the Almighty, for the soul of his parents." This Hadith is reported by Muslim.

In fact, such a statement reflects the value of the proper upbringing of children. It has an everlasting effect, even after death.

Unfortunately, many parents from every walk of life, in every society, regardless of creed, origin, social and economical status, etc., have neglected this very important imposed right of their own children on them. Such individuals have indeed lost their children as a result of their own negligence. Such parents are so careless about the time their children spend with no benefit, the friends they associate with, the places they go to, etc. Such parents do not care, are totally indifferent about where their children go, when they come back and so forth and so on, causing the children to grow up without any responsible adult and without caring supervision. Such parents neglect even to instruct, direct or guide their children to the proper way of life, behaviour or even right attitudes towards others.

Yet, you may find these parents are so careful about guarding their wealth. They are extremely concerned about their businesses, work and otherwise. They exert every possible effort to lead a very successful life in terms of materialistic gains, although all this wealth is not actually theirs. No one will take wealth to the grave.

Children are not only to be well-fed, well-groomed, properly dressed for the weather and for appearance, well-taken care of in terms of housing and utilities. It is more important to offer the child comparable care in terms of educational, religious training, and spiritual guidance. The heart of a child must be filled with faith. A child’s mind must be entertained with proper guidance, knowledge and wisdom. Clothes, food, housing, schooling are not, by any means, an indication of proper care of the child. Proper education and guidance is far more important to a child than this food, grooming and appearance.

One of the due rights of children upon their parents is their spending for their welfare and well-being moderately. Over-spending or negligence is not condoned, accepted or even tolerated in Islam. Such ways will have a negative effect on the child regardless of the social status. Men are urged not to be miserly to their children and households, who are their natural heirs in every religion and society. Why would one be miserly to those who are going to inherit his wealth?

Children are entitled to such an important right. They are even permitted to take moderately from their parent's wealth to sustain themselves if the parent declines to give them proper funds for their living.

Children also have the right to be treated equally in terms of financial gifts. No one should be preferred over the others. All must be treated fairly and equally. None should be deprived his gift from the parents. Depriving, or banning the right of inheritance, or other financial gifts during the lifetime of the parents or the preference of a parent for one child over the other is considered according to Islam as an act of injustice.

Injustice will definitely lead to an atmosphere of hatred, anger and dismay amongst the children in a household. In fact, such an act of injustice may, most likely, lead to animosity amongst the children, and consequently, this will affect the entire family environment. In certain cases a special child may show a tender care for his aging parent, for instance, causing the parent to grant such a child a special gift, or issue him the ownership of a house, a factory, a land, a farm, a car, or any other valuable items.

Islam, however considers such a financial reward to such a caring, loving and perhaps obedient child, a wrong act. A caring child is entitled only to a reward from Allah, the Almighty. Although it is nice to grant such a child something in appreciation for his dedication and special efforts, this must not lead to an act of disobedience to Allah, the Almighty. It may be that the heart and feelings of such a loving and caring child may change, at one point in time, causing him to become a nasty and harmful child. By the same token, a nasty child may change, at any given time, as well, to become a very caring and kind child to the same parent.

The hearts and feelings are, as we all know, in the hands of Allah, the Almighty, and can be turned in any direction at any given time and without any previous notice. This, indeed, is one of the reasons for preventing the act of financial preference of a child over another. On the other hand, there is also no assurance or guarantee that a caring child can handle the financial gift of his parent wisely.

It is narrated by Abu Bakr, RAA, who said that Allah's Apostle, PBUH, was approached by one of his companions, al-N'uman bin Basheer, who said: "O Prophet of Allah! I have granted a servant to one of my children (asking him to testify to that gift)." But Allah's PBUH asked him: "Did you grant the same to each and every child of yours?" When Allah's Apostle, PBUH was informed negatively about that, he said: "Fear Allah, the Almighty, and be fair and just to all your children. Seek the testimony of another person, other than me. I will not testify to an act of injustice." This Hadith is reported by both Bukhari and Muslim. Thus, Allah's Apostle, PBUH called such an act of preference of one child over the others an act of "injustice." Injustice is prohibited and forbidden in Islam.

But, if a parent granted one of his children financial help to fulfill a necessity, such as a medical treatment coverage, the cost of a marriage, the cost of initializing a business, etc., then such a grant would not be categorized an act of injustice and unfairness. Such a gift will fall under the right to spend in the essential needs of the children, which is a requirement that a parent must fulfill.

Islam sees that if parents fulfill their duties towards all their children in terms of providing them with necessary training, educational backing, moral, ethical and religious education, this will definitely lead to a more caring child, a better family atmosphere and a better social environment and awareness. On the other hand, any negligence in those parental duties can lead to the loss of a child or ill treatment of the parents at a later age.

:: A Child's Pray ::

:: BIsmillah, I am a Muslim ::

:: My mum is amazing ::

:: Orphan Child by Zain Bhikha ::

:: Are you raising your kids according to Islam? ::

Assalam Alaikum,

Alhamdulliah!! Praises to Allah (SWT) for making me a muslim before I start a family! So that I can get ready for the future! hehehehe~

Years being a teacher has made me realised what the person said in the video is soOooo true~ Caretaker of the kids (Usually the parents~) are indeed role models~ Children are just a reflection of their parents! 100% proven! That's why teachers are cautious about talking to parents about "naughty" kids... hehehe~ You know what I mean? =D

First, let me be a goodie maama by getting more knowledge of Islam and finding a goodie paapa! Then we shall be goodie role models for the kiddos! =D

W'salam,

Khadijah C.

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